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My husband and I recently celebrated our anniversary. This event was promptly overshadowed by the realization that it was also the anniversary of the date that my cat, Brandy, first came into my life.

You see, my husband and I celebrate the day that we went from individual awkward, cranky cat people ambling around Los Angeles to a couple of awkward, cranky cat people ambling around Los Angeles. Our wedding anniversary is all well and good, but it’s just so new, we haven’t adjusted yet.

As my husband got ready for work that morning, and I contemplated whether it was a “work in real clothes” day or “work in the knee-length Elvis t-shirt I call a dress but the rest of the world calls ‘transparent and upsetting’” day, I realized the significance of the date.

One of us is excited. One of us is embarrassed for the other.

One of us is excited. One of us is embarrassed for the other.

“Holy crap! It’s our anniversary!” I yelped.

“I know, love, happy anniversary!” my husband said sweetly for the second time that morning as he leaned in to give me a kiss on the cheek.

“Uh huh,” I graciously accepted the kiss. “But it’s also Brandy’s and my anniversary! It’s the anniversary of the day she allowed me to invade her — your — life!”

I called out to Brandy as she conducted her morning bath: “I love you cat-face! Happy anniversary!”

She gave me a not-unkind glare and proceeded to lick her butt. Such is our relationship.

While I spent much of the day, and even the next few days, trying to make our “Brandyversary” special, Brandy seemed determined to show me that my life with her was a “privilege, not a right.” Here are the highlights.

1. That’s it?

That afternoon I concocted Brandy a little treat for lunch, what I’ve come to call the Brandy Blitz. It’s basically the tastiest parts of her meals without the entree. Warmed goat milk and her raw meat sprinkles mixed with a dash of this cheesy flavored tooth powder she’s obsessed with.

Yum, right?

She’s doesn’t get this treat often, so I thought she might acknowledge the specialness with a wink of appreciation, or,  dare I dream … a snuggle?

It went more like this:

eating-brandy

She happily gobbled her food then accused me of withholding more treats from her. She yowled at me for the next hour then retreated to the bathroom.

2. Memories are for losers

I really wanted to commemorate our anniversary with a picture to place on the mantel so future generations might gaze upon our love.

Okay, fine. I wanted proof.

It’s a joke amongst our friends and family that somehow I’ve found myself in total adoration of a cat who sees the order of our family’s status as: Brandy, my husband, the sweater she stole from me, and then somewhere tied with the can-opener is me. But Brandy does indeed offer me lots of affection, and I do think she loves me in her own kitty way. Just not when anybody is around.

So I tried to take some Brandyversary pictures.

Brandy hates selfies.

Brandy hates selfies.

They pretty much amounted to me looking enthused (insane), and her looking annoyed.

Gaze upon our love!

Gaze upon our love!

3. My enthusiasm is charming … damn it

As I carried on with the day’s celebration, I took more than one break to cuddle up to Brandy and give her some extra scratches.

This part of the day was to her liking, that is until I would “ruin” things by getting nostalgic and recounting our origin story.

“I remember when we first met,” I’d say. “I was coming out of the bathroom at your old apartment on Romaine Street, and there you were! Staring at me.

“I was told that you’d hide from me for days, but you came right out to size me up. After you laid the ground rules of who was in charge (at the time the hierarchy was you, my then boyfriend, the rainbow snake toy, the can opener, the roommate, then me), we scratched on it, and I’ve been clawing my way up the status ladder ever since. I love you, kitten!”

At some point during the story, she’d stand up and sit AWAY from me. I got the kitty side-eye.

"Are you done?"

“Are you done?”

4. Computer hostage negotiation

Brandy held my computer hostage. She does this sometimes.

I set my computer down on the bed while I fetched some socks, and when I returned, she had laid claim to it. Brandyversary or not, I was NOT getting the “warm, metal attention stealer” back anytime soon. This was confirmed by a MEEEOOOOW and a swat when I tried to coax it from her grasp.

"Oh, did you need this?"

“Oh, did you need this?”

I thought this might be a bid for attention, so I settled in to stroke her and reminisce some more about our greatest moments. She scampered away to the closet.

5. Happy anniversary … nice slippers

The slippers didn’t deserve it.

These are my kitty slippers. My warm, cozy, innocent kitty slippers. They were punished.

kitty slippers

As a special anniversary gift to me, Brandy barfed in them. In them, not on them.

Happy anniversary to me.

pretty brandy
Despite all of Brandy’s hijinks and grumpiness, I have never been happier with this spunky old broad. She keeps me on my toes — laughing, and inspired.

And if it means I get to celebrate many more Brandyversaries, I’d happily offer up all of my shoes for punishment.

Read more by Louise Hung:

About the author: Louise Hung is a morbidly inclined cat lady living in Yokohama, Japan, with her cat, her man, and probably a couple ghost cats. She also writes for xoJane. You can follow her on Twitter or drop her a line at IamLouiseMicaela@gmail.com.

 

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Known for their soft, luxurious fur and sweet temperament, Persian cats have been called everything from perfect companions to “pretty couch potatoes.” These fluffy feline friends may require a little extra grooming to keep their long hair looking its best, but they’ll reward your effort by being chill, talkative, and generally hilarious.

Not convinced that Persians are rad? Check out these videos – and if you’re thinking of adopting, try a shelter or rescue group first. Plenty of Persians are in need of homes.

1. Hide and seek

Kemo Sabe the Persian kitten enjoys the most adorable game of hide and seek I’ve ever seen in my life. Her face is so cute I kind of can’t even believe she exists.

2. Grooming is good

This informative grooming session featuring Benji the Persian is actually rather calming to watch. Benji’s temperament is identified as “compliant,” meaning he basically just sits there while the gentle-voiced groomer turns him into a “giant teddy bear.”

3. Chop chop!

This Persian kitten prefers his kibble to be delivered directly to his mouth, piece by piece, using chopsticks. Time consuming? Maybe. Adorable? Certainly.

4. Watermelon addiction

Cooper the kitten has found his new favorite food: a slice of fresh, juicy watermelon. Trust me when I say this is good news for everyone involved – except the dogs he pushes out of the way to get another sloppy slurp.

5. Nodding off

This very sweet, very tired kitten looks like me when I fall asleep on an airplane. He’s just about to tip over when he wakes up and rights himself, only to doze off again seconds later.

Bonus video!

Here’s how to draw a Persian according to Simon Tofield, the inimitable creator of Simon’s Cat.

Watch more videos we love by Angela Lutz:

Learn more about your cat with Catster:

About Angela: This not-crazy-at-all cat lady loves to lint-roll her favorite dress and go out dancing. She also frequents the gym, the vegan coffee joint, and the warm patch of sunlight on the living room floor. She enjoys a good cat rescue story about kindness and decency overcoming the odds, and she’s an enthusiastic recipient of headbutts and purrs from her two cats, Bubba Lee Kinsey and Phoenix.

The post Videos We Love: 5 Reasons Why Persian Cats Are Awesome appeared first on Catster.

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This week’s hottest feline topic of conversation is — wait for it — cat butts. Yup, if you’re not talking about your kitty’s carefully crafted derriere then you’re missing out. I suspected something was afoot when, out of the blue, I was given a coin purse that doubles up as a handy field guide to the nether ends of various breeds. Here is the thing.

CatButtCoinPurse

Soon after that I discovered the gag-gift that is Twinkle Tush — bedazzled jewelry for your kitty that will hide that unsightly poop hole once and for all. You can check out a pic of a plugged-up cat model below (and watch a video of the product here).

TwinkleTush

Image via Twinkle Tush.

Finally, if you really want to go all out and broadcast your love of cats butts to the world, you can contribute to a Kickstarter campaign for what’s being touted as “the ultimate ugly sweater.” As you’ve probably guessed by now, it features a kitty engaging in some butt-grooming while dreaming of ice cream. This is what it will look like.

CatUglySweaterKickstarter

Image via Kickstarter.

The garment is the brainchild of the designer Jon Wye, whose company is apparently known for making belts but now wants to expand into the trending cat butt market for reasons not entirely clear to me. Would you sport this sweater? And how do you feel about cat butts in general? Reveal all in the comments.

About Phillip Mlynar: The self-appointed world’s foremost expert on rappers’ cats. When not penning posts on rap music, he can be found building DIY cat towers for his adopted domestic shorthair, Mimosa, and collecting Le Creuset cookware (in red). He has also invented cat sushi, but it’s not quite what you think it is.

The post The World’s Ultimate Ugly Sweater Stars a Cat Butt appeared first on Catster.

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#TrumpYourCat: Embarrass Your Feline Using Bad Hair

Posted July 15th, 2015 by admin

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Like many people, I’ve been watching Donald Trump’s presidential campaign with a mixture of horror and amusement. His naked racism, arrogant bullying of anyone who crosses his path, and grandiose messiah complex make for great television but horrible politics. It shows just how much difference money can make: If Trump were pulling down $35,000 a year working at a Walmart, he’d be considered somebody’s embarrassing uncle who just doesn’t know when to shut up instead of a news source.

But if money makes the difference in one thing, it should at least mean that you have better hair than Trump has. The one good thing that has come out of Trump’s campaign/performance art is that Berke Breathed has been inspired to revive his classic strip Bloom County. In the 1980s, Breathed put Trump’s brain into the body of Bill the Cat, and even then, it was an improvement on the real Donald’s hair grooming. The intervening years have not been kind to Trump.

The latest salute to Donald Trump’s hair also involves cats, but now we have the Internet, so it’s a little different than Breathed’s approach. This time around, it uses live cats. #TrumpYourCat is the latest hashtag to go viral on Twitter and Instagram. It was inspired by the Instagram account of Donald Purrump, which gives these very simple instructions:

1. Brush your cat

2. Form the hair you brushed into a toupee

3. Place toupee on cat

4. Share & tag @trumpyourcat, DM, or #trumpyourcat >^.~.^<

The results are hilarious, as you can see below. But are the cats enjoying it? Most of them, frankly, look a bit nonplussed at the thing resting atop their heads. Take this one for example:

In all honesty, that expression says to me, “I am plotting my bloody vengeance, and you will all suffer for this humiliation.”

You see that expression in quite a lot of the #TrumpYourCat photos, to be honest. Inevitably, a few imposters have started to creep in, such as this hamster:

As with the above picture, the quotes that accompany the pictures are the most disturbing part of the whole enterprise. For all the mockery of his hair, Trump’s open xenophobia, racism, and general disgust for the human race is hard to stomach. Hence, you have to pair it with cute cat pictures. Cute cat pictures make (almost) everything better.

"Anyone who thinks my story is anywhere near over is sadly mistaken." – @realdonaldtrump ?? via @tinaf78

A photo posted by Donald Purrump (@trumpyourcat) on

Have you Trumped your cat? If so, will he or she still associate with you in public? Either way, let us know. We’d love to see the pictures.

Top banner photo credit: Albert H. Teich / Shutterstock.com

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Look out, Puppy Bowl. There’s a brand new game in town, and come this Sunday afternoon, this new Mid-Summer Classic could gain on the canine contest’s popularity with cat-like quickness.

Baseball has always been known as professional team sports’ most leisurely game, and that certainly fits in with the feline lifestyle. So it was only natural that there would be a kitty All-Star Game, and the Hallmark Channel is all over it, with the premiere of the “Paw Star Game” this Sunday at 5 p.m. EST.

Airing two days before Major League Baseball holds its annual All-Star Game in Cincinnati, the Paw Star Game gathers some of the biggest names in cat baseball to show off their hitting and fielding prowess.

pawstars

Not to mention a cat’s favorite baseball play: defensive indifference.

Where else will you find such household cats with legendary household names such as Joe DiMeowgio, Roberto Clawmente, Cartlon Frisky, Roger Clawmens, Cy-Amese Young, and Don Cattingly; as well as current starts Mike Troutbreath, Clayton Kerclaw and Derek Cheetah?

pawstars600-02

Hosted by TV personality and North Shore Animal League America spokesperson Beth Stern, the Paw Star Game features four teams of cats, as well as a group of “legends” players, with all the action on the field described by New York Yankees radio play-by-play voice John Sterling and veteran sports commentator Mary Carillo.

Unlike the Puppy Bowl, the Paw Star Game features several celebrity fans cheering on the players, including Ed Asner, Maria Menounos, Mario Lopez, Al Roker, Heather McDonald, Tricia Helfer, Deidre Hall, Dawn Olivieri and Camren Bicondova.

But the true All-Stars are on the field, and fans can watch a Hall-of-Fame collection of video highlights on the Paw Star Game website. Located in the Cat Center, the clips include highlights of great Paw Star Game classics – who could ever forget Kirk Kitson’s dramatic walk-off homer in 1988? – “cat-lete” player profiles, regular-season moments and a preview of Sunday’s showdown.

Here are the rosters for the inaugural Paw Star Game:

Gold Crown Catamounts

  • C — Carlton Frisky. Favorite Movie: “Frisky Business”
  • 2B– Fluffy Frisky. Nickname: “Fudge”
  • OF — Kat Griffy Jr. 10x Golden Paw Award Winner
  • 3B – Patches. Favorite Book: “The Great Catsby”
  • OF — Tyger Cobb. Nickname: “Georgia Peach Fuzz”
  • P — Tomcat Lasorda. Nickname: “The Pawdfather”
  • P — Danders Dale. All time record 154 hit catsmen
  • SS — Feline Hernandez. Nickname: “King Feline”
  • 1B – Buddy. Favorite Movie: “The Big Meowski”

North Shore Bengals

  • P — Corey Clawber. Nickname: “Big Orange”
  • 3B — Button. Favorite Movie: “Cattyshack”
  • OF — Whitey Furred. Nickname: “Frisky Licks”
  • 1B — Don Cattingly. Nickname: “The Lickman”
  • C — Cuddles Cattingly. Acatemy Award winning Actor
  • SS — Purfessor Issac Furrowitz. “P.H.D. in Psyclawlogy”
  • P — Roger Clawmens. Nickname: “The hissle”
  • 2B — Rod Purrew. Member of the Beastly Boys
  • OF — Darryl Pawberry. Nickname: “The Pawman”
  • OF — Siamese Sosa. Childhood Hero: Roberto Clawmente
  • P — Cy-Amese Young. Nickname: “The Siamese Cyclone

Mystery Meercats

  • 1B — Paw Prints Fielder. Favorite Rapper: Mice Cube
  • OF — Beau Catson. Kitten Bowl 2015 Champion
  • OF — Jose Catseco. Member of the “Dash Brothers”
  • P — Willie Strays. Nickname: “Stray Hey Kitten”
  • 2B – Oliver. Favorite Food: Ratatouille
  • SS — Derek Cheetah. Nickname: “Mr. Meow-vember”
  • OF — Hunter Pounce. Favorite Videogame: “Collar Duty”
  • 3B — Wade Pawggs. Favorite Food: “Purritos”
  • C — Socks. Favorite Author: Purrman Meowville 

Keepsake Cougars

  • 3B — Cat Ripken Jr. Nickname “The Iron Kitten”
  • P — Clayton Kerclaw. 3-Time Cy-amese Young Award Winner
  • OF — Mike Troutbreath. Motto- “Let the fur fly”
  • P — Rick “Wild Paw” Clawn. Favorite TV Show- “two and a half cats”
  • 2B — Milky Catbrera. Nickname “Moo Juice”
  • C — Ray Fuzzy. Golden Paw Award Winner
  • OF — Hairy Bonds. Short-Hairizona State University
  • 1B – Max. Favorite Film: The Wizard of Paws
  • SS — Stray-Rod. Hobbies: Chasing Tail

Historical Players

  • Roberto Clawmente
  • Sandy Kocats
  • Bombaybe Ruth
  • “Bootless” Joe Catson
  • “Hairballin” Hank Purron
  • Joe DiMeowgio
  • Lurk Kitson
  • Mickey Meowntle
  • Pawdger Hairless
  • Mew Gherig

About the author: Jeff Goldberg is a freelance writer in Quincy, Mass. A former editor for MLB.com and sportswriter for the Hartford Courant who covered the University of Connecticut’s women’s basketball team (Huskies!) and the Boston Red Sox, Jeff has authored two books on the UConn women: Bird at the Buzzer (2011) and Unrivaled (2015). He lives with his wife, Susan, and their rescue pup, Rocky, an Italian Greyhuahua/Jack Russell mix from a foster home in Tennessee, hence the name Rocky (as in Rocky Top).

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Meet Luhu the Sad-Face Kitty

Posted July 8th, 2015 by admin

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The world is filled with cats sporting distinctive markings that make them look like they’re perennially perturbed. Why, just the other month we put the spotlight on Gary, a constantly concerned kitten. But now we have a new contender on the block — and his story has a twist to it.

Named Luhu, this plush kitty might appear like he’s always on the verge of breaking into tears, such is the sad look on his face. But it turns out that his facial expressions come from an eye infection he caught when he was only a couple of weeks old. This means that he ends up squinting a lot and putting on a sad face.

Here’s what you need to know about Luhu, the star of the show in his full sad face glory.

A photo posted by Maggie Liu (@lanlan731) on

And here’s Luhu back when he was just three weeks old.

A photo posted by Maggie Liu (@lanlan731) on

This would make for a fine “I Hate Mondays” poster, right?

A photo posted by Maggie Liu (@lanlan731) on

Gonna call this early — Luhu is a snuggle bug.

A photo posted by Maggie Liu (@lanlan731) on

Luhu lives in Beijing with two brothers, Barher and Bardie, and from this video footage we see he’s totally the boss kitty.

A video posted by Maggie Liu (@lanlan731) on

Not a fan of pandas.

A photo posted by Maggie Liu (@lanlan731) on

Luhu always suspected that the outside world was a sad and lonely place.

A photo posted by Maggie Liu (@lanlan731) on

He’s already inspiring fan art.

A photo posted by Maggie Liu (@lanlan731) on

Luhu might have an adorable sad face, but he is severely lacking in hiding skills.

A photo posted by Maggie Liu (@lanlan731) on

 

See more Pix We Love from Phillip Mlynar:

About Phillip Mlynar: The self-appointed world’s foremost expert on rappers’ cats. When not penning posts on rap music, he can be found building DIY cat towers for his adopted domestic shorthair, Mimosa, and collecting Le Creuset cookware (in red). He has also invented cat sushi, but it’s not quite what you think it is.

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